orders filled

Well, the latest news is that both the orders I got recently were filled, and the recipients loved them. That's awesome, and quite inspiring. I am planning on making a velvet jacket for one of my clients in hopes she will buy it. We'll see. I'll make an extra for myself to keep. If she doesn't buy it, I'm sure I can sell it at a show sometime. If nothing else, I will learn a lot making it.



As far as the actual job goes... it's been rocky. I've been nothing short of worn out, and I have been angry with some of the sales managers. One of them told my boss that I was the "weakest link". My boss wasn't sure if he should tell me or not, but he carefully found words to tell me how I'm percieved outside of our office, and how it's FAR from true. He said all I can do is prove the guy wrong. Of course, he's egging me on to become a lead, which sounds like a great idea, but I'm already worn out. We'll see what happens. I want to let some of my collegues scope out what it's like before I jump into it. Of course, since I'll be the last to become a lead, it will make me look bad, but I do what is right for me, not what is right for my reputation.

If my boss really wants to improve my reputation, he can give me a store champion award in front of the whole store. I am trying really hard not to get my hopes up. Sometimes I wonder what am I doing all of it for.


It is aggrivating for me, because I thought I was making good money at my job, but when I compare it to what my husband makes it is nothing but peanuts. He makes almost twice what I do. Granted, his job is related somehow to what he went to school for, but I work a hell of a lot harder for a lot less.

The more I think about it, the more I want to run my own art biz. Of course, the shows themselves may not earn a lot of money, but the clients I'll get from the shows will be the key. Especially if I can have a website to coordinate with it. I really feel like I could earn a living at it, but I want to take each step with caution. I wanted to do a show in the fall (since they supposedly make more money) but so many of my friends are getting married, and it is using up a lot of my weekends off... and if you remember, I only get one saturday off a month. My husband wants me to quit eventually. Maybe once we have a house, I'll consider doing that.

back in action

Well, I didn't get Store Champion. After the award was given, my boss told me that if he could have given two I would have got one because I deserved it. Well, that's nice. Close doesn't count. Maybe I'll get it next time, or maybe I'll just stop caring!

So, I haven't posted in awhile. This is because I was bummed out. Partially bummed about not getting Store Champion, and partially bummed because I was uninspired to finish anything, and of course, my trip to Kansas City was lame. (Everytime I left my hotel room, I got lost, so I stopped going out. I basically worked overtime and watched tv alot.)

Anyway, I'm back to my happy inspired self. I was thinking maybe I will be a lead at work (because it pays more, not because I really want to move up in the company. My feelings about wanting to move up at work have dwindled, because my boss has no social life, and the manager at Kansas City has an even suckier life. In addition, moving up usually means moving... as in moving to a new city. There is no way in hell my hubby would want to move for my company. He doesn't like that I am working there at all, let alone uproot both of us for it. The good news though is that there is a rumor that there will be another location built in one of the suburbs around here, so that could potentially oepn up spots to be promoted into. Of course, it is still a rumor, and our store would have to be crazy busy for several months for there to be another store built. The process could take years... if it even happens at all! None the less, the lead position dangles in front of my nose like a carrot. It's considered a stepping stone to higher positions, but even then, who cares. It's more money, and that's what matters.

Of course, over the last month, I haven't dyed anything until tonight. I was uninspired, and starting to feel like a concept I was working on was near it's death. I was experimenting with making mesh out of jersey knit fabric... and slowly discovering that it can be ugly even more easily than it can be cool looking. The concept needs a lot of work, and I need a lot of motivation!

Yesterday, my dyeing dry spell came to an end. I suddenly had inspiration when a client called to order some tie dye shirts. Sigh, what a huge relief. My work is actually pleasant, and there are people that like it enough to buy it. How awesome is that! So, I ordered a shirt to dye for her. And low and behold, the shipping options were more awesome than ever. Another huge relief. Since I was in such a good mood, I decided to dye a dress that I had been meaning to do. So far it looks awesome!

In other news, my husband got another raise. I'm so happy for him, but I am also insanely jealous. He is only 4k away from making exactly TWICE what I do. And he comes home from work almost everyday telling me that he didn't do much and he was bored all day. NICE. I work my tail off all day every day... and sometimes put in overtime... to make a wage that I couldn't live on if I lived alone. Well, I could get by, but I couldn't save for retirement or afford health insurance or anything like that... that's not living to me. That's just surviving.

Well, that's it for now. I'll be sure to include updates as to what is going on in the crazy world of day jobs and dream jobs!

bored, believe it or not

Now that my family has gone home, and we have time left today before we have to go back to work tomorrow... I find myself doing nothing. I could do all sorts of fun fabric stuff, cleaning, or getting some excersize outside, but I find myself sitting around, eating when I'm not hungry, and playing on the internet.

Strangely enough, I look forward to going back to work tomorrow. Just because I have no motivation, and there is always an adrenaline rush at work.

tired

Today I worked a full 9 hours at the day job. Overtime is annoying to me. I worked so hard, and got so tired that I started making sloppy mistakes. Lucky me, I get to go in early tomorrow and work some more! I am very glad that I will be taking a mini vacation to spend time with family.

Speaking of family, my tie dye got tons of attention at the family reunion/b-day party on Sunday. Not only was I wearing my awesome shirt, but my aunt Marj wore every single tie dye item I have ever made her (except the winter scarf) and that drew even more attention to it. And of course, I had to give little bro a shirt for his b-day. Grandma says she will buy a couple purses like Marj has, but honestly, I can't charge her for it. If I were to make it anywhere close to covering the cost of my time, they'd be well over $100 each, and they are not high enough quality to go for that. I test drove one of my sewn bags, and it was terrible. It only lasted a few months before it started showing serious signs of wear. I could not ethically charge Grandma for that. They take forever to make, and I'm really not that good at sewing.

Anyway, I hope I get a little bit of time to make some stuff and maybe check out another art show this week. I know work will wear me out again tomorrow because all the big dogs are there for our celebratory steak cookout, which we earned for selling a bazillion cars last month. I am so worn out from it. And when all the big dogs are there, all the employees go brown nose with them and leave their work for others to do... I can't wait for my mini vacation to start!!!!!

nudge

Today was awesome.

First, I went to the Talbot Street Art Fair. I ended up lucky with the schedule at the day job, because I was closing. That means I had plenty of time to go exploring art stuff in the morning.

I had a great time at the art fair. I bought some earrings made out of dichroic glass. I also got to see how the vendors were set up, and get an idea for the quality of work. I was fairly impressed. I did see a couple of dye artists there, where they only decorated the clothing as opposed to sewing it. They were both very high quality (not neccessarily my style, but still quality). They were unique from most other dyers, and the designs were pleasing to the eye. There were even a few designs that I had to ponder for a minute to figure out how they made them. I even had to touch a few just so I could figure out what the materials were. It was very intriguing. It was also interesting, because I just got my Bruce Baker CDs in the mail this week, and I was comparing the behavior and setups of the vendors to the suggestions on the CDs. It made me realize what is interesting and what is boring, and what is intimidating, etc from a customer's point of view.

I would go as far as to say that Talbot Street would be a show I'd apply to once I have my act together. By that, I mean once I have a consistent style and set of slides. For now I'm mostly applying to non-juried shows, which are hardly profitable. Talbot Street had an big turn out. It was very crowded, and most of the customers were actually buying or seriously considering it. They were all piling in early. The show started at 10, I got there at 9:50 and it was already packed with people. When I get seriously into shows, I want my booth to be packed with interested customers like that. It was nice to see. Of course, it was also funny to see how vendors act when they aren't quite done setting up, and people are flooding in!

I went to the day job at 2pm, sporting my gorgeous new earrings. I got tons of compliments and EVERYONE noticed. Lots of people said, "you don't normally wear earrings, do you?" and then it led to a few conversations about where I got them, and why I'm so happy to wear them.

Then, after I ran a few deals, I met up with my boss for my file review. He hinted that I might be the next Store Champion, which is our company's version of employee of the month more or less. So, soon enough, I'll be getting a good parking space, and a prize... probably a gift card or something, but still, it will be awesome! And of course, my boss happened to mention that he knows I'm comfortable where I'm at... but if that ever changes, wink wink nudge nudge, to let him know. Basically, he wants to get me groomed for a promotion. I just told him what all I want to learn before I get to that stage. He agreed, and basically I overheard him telling another associate what all needs to be covered before that person can be promoted... and it was more or less my plan for myself. I'm thinking toward the end of this year, or early next year I'll ask about it and climb that ladder. Unless of course, my art career takes of.

It would appear that the stakes are getting higher and higher all the time for this major decision of where my career will go. Of course, it also gets more entertaining. Each field has it's promising aspects. The art thing is going to be fun, and I will finally know what it's like to be professional at it. I still consider myself to be a hobbyist in many ways, but like I said, once I get a consistent body of work, I'll apply to some good shows. Of course, also, I also have things to learn in my day job before that promotion hits... so I'm imagining both happening at around the same time.

On a side note, I also found out why I'm going to Kansas City next month. I am going to help out because they have a lot of new people, and only one manager. From what I understand, it's a big store too. I will be a leader in many ways, and it will be good experience. Also, since they only have one manager in the office... it is kind of shoving it in my face that our company is ready to promote as many people as quickly as they can get qualified to take it. This is very much the reason why I work there. I get so bored doing the same crap and never getting recognized for it. I am definately recognized now!

Well, I'm going to sign off for the night. Little bro's birthday party is tomorrow, and I have to be there, not to mention with my angry husband. He's angry because the party was supposed to be at our place, and my Grandma hijacked it. Woo hoo! A three year old's birthday party out in the middle of nowhere! Maybe I'll take my Bruce Baker CDs and a CD player with me in case I get bored...

PS. We got Dave's car back. It's fixed and it looks nice. It didn't really take a month. She was just kidding.

good, bad, and ugly!

Well, this week has certainly been eventful! I dyed, cut and sewed some awesome shirts, and I'm very proud! I think the designs I made could be the start of a series with mesh, because it is so forgiving, and the potential to create varaitions on it is amazing!

I am also excited because I ordered the Bruce Baker CDs. They are supposed to be very helpful for artists and craftspeople.

In other exciting news from the car dealership, I might be going on another business trip. I love those, because I enjoy maids cleaning up after me for a week, as well as the fact that I get to eat out all the time on the company's dime! It's way fun.

The bad news, and yes UGLY news, is that the dealership wrecked my husbands car. I had brought it in for service, and the service consultant backed it into a pole. Dave was hella mad at first, but they are fixing it for us, and they gave us a loaner car to drive. The bad news is that it's a Ford Taurus (ugh) that they loaned us and he's going to drive my pretty car while I drive the boat! The dang Taurus drives like a bus. It's hard to speed up, slow down or turn. I hate it! Dave is driving around my car which has butterfly seat covers! He doesn't care though. My car is actually kind of nice. Of course, his car will probably be tied up for a MONTH while getting fixed.
And of course, I forgot to empty it, so all the tennis rackets, rollerblades, etc in his trunk will be tied up for that month too. For 1/3 of this glorious summer, he will be bored to death. What fun!

leaning toward art, but still unsure

I'm still thinking about the whole day job versus art thing. When I think in terms of the next year or so, I want to focus on my day job, because it has a steady paycheck and benefits. When I think of long term, I want to focus on my art, because it keeps me sane. Of course, many artists have full careers in other fields and wait for retirement to pursue art. I do NOT want to be one of those artists. I want to do it while I am still young. I want to make art not only because it's fun, but also because I feel a need to do it. I have great skill and inspiration, which does not come easily to everyone. I feel that I shouldn't waste that energy. I feel like a day job is something I should "fall back" on, rather than do first. I just want consistent money until I have a downpayment for a house. But, sometime, before I'm old, or even aging... I'm going to pursue art as a career.

Until then, I continue to do my best at the car dealership. I mostly want to keep as many doors open as possible. If I do end up falling back on it, I want it to be there to fall back on.

Also, until then, I will continue to keep my eyes open for art fairs that I can do on my one Saturday off a month. I will continue to build my skills and find my style. I will keep making art, and considering what the public will buy.

I have also seen some discussions online about whether artists should make art for critics and museums or if they should make art for the public. I want to make it for the public. Sometimes I think about making a legacy, but I think a LOT more often about making money. My art will be good, no doubt, but I'm not going to only please the people who formally studied art. I will try to make it to please common people who know very little about art history or art theory. If someone can only say "I like it" or "I don't like it" and just pick out what colors are in an artwork, I still have respect for them. It's ok if you "don't know much about art". As long as you respond to it, I'm there for you.

Anyway, I'm getting tired and rambling. Tomorrow will be a big day with the in laws. We're going to visit Dave's brother in Bloomington. That should be fun. I just hope it doesn't take the entire day, because I have lots of things to do on my day off.